Presents vs. Presence

It is the holiday season and I live in the Christmas capital of Texas. We have a train that runs the Polar Express, all of Main Street is decked out in Christmas stuff, and we have serious shopping.

I made the mistake of running by the local mall Monday on my way home. (Yes, I have a couple of Christmas gifts I have yet to have found…. Oops!) In the mall I watched people run around franticly trying to find that oh-so-perfect-last-minute-gift.  This is not the only time this holiday season that I have been amazed at how the presents that people give to one another. I listened in amazement as a woman recently described to me her adventures on Black Friday and how she devised a plan with her girlfriends to ensure that they got the best deal.

This is a bit of a foreign concept for me.

The holidays are a weird time in my world. I am not good at receiving gifts; in fact I am really bad at it. I am great at giving gifts. I love to give things to other people but I get uncomfortable when given a gift. I have a tendency to look for the strings that must be attached to the gift.

I am working with my team members and counselors on developing myself to be a mature Christian woman. One of the things that my team members have had me working on is understanding how to communicate love to people. I read through Dr. Gary Chapman’s book the Five Love Languages and you know what? For me, presence is much more important than presents.  I would rather not exchange gifts and instead spend time with the people I love. 

And it is ok for me to prefer presence to presents! It doesn’t make me a scrooge or boring. I just want to connect with the people in my life who matter to me. That is how I receive love. 

Don’t get me wrong, Christmas is fun and festive, but I will be happiest this holiday season while I am driving all over Texas to be with both the biological and acquired family.