Perfection

I have spent a lot of time pursuing a very illusive goal and that goal is?

Perfection. 

I come from a beautiful family.

I don't mean we had it all together, because that certainly wasn't the case. I don't mean that we had a picture perfect family, that isn't true either. I mean that my family members are breath-taking and it is entirely natural. My sister is a gorgeous amazon, my mother is a beautiful damsel and those are just the closest to me. Aunts, grandmas, even the men in my family are beautiful. And not in like a "in the right light" kind of way, but in an obvious way.

I cannot tell you how much this got to me, especially in my teen years. I struggled with my self image and even my self worth.

I am a bit of a perfectionist. The idea that I was less than perfect used to drive me crazy. I would go above and beyond to achieve my idea of perfection. Straightening my hair, applying eyeliner, selecting the perfect outfit. My motivation was that if I could look perfect on the outside no one would guess that I was crumbling inside.

Do you know what made the difference for me? Jesus Christ. God doesn't care if I can apply my eyeliner flawlessly. 1 Samuel 16:7 says, "Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him.The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart". So I am not an amazon, and I can't play the damsel in distress. You know what I am? I am a child of God. I am worth more than the make-up I wipe off at the end of the day.