Title Tuesday: Refresh

Welcome to  Title Tuesday, my favorite day of the week! This day is dedicated to book suggestions and reviews. I write this portion of my blog because I am a big believer in the motivational speaker Charlie Jones' quote which says, "You will be the same person in five years as you are today except for the people you meet and the books you read.” I try to meet as many new people as possible and to read everything I can. This is my way of sharing that information with you. If you are interested in understanding my rating system for books you can read my Book Review Explanation here and What I Believe here. If you want to check out what I am currently reading or what I want to read next, friend me on Goodreads!

It is the new year and almost everyone is talking about resolutions, goals, or words for 2018. I think that is just fabulous! Being focused and intentional can help you be a better parent, spouse, and even follower of Christ. Many people won't be able to follow through on their resolutions and goals because they are pouring from an empty cup.   But don't worry, there is a fix! 

Shona and David Murray's book Refresh is probably the best book I have read in the last six months, maybe even in the last year. This is NOT simply another book by a female Christian talking about how overwhelming life can be. 

If it was, I wouldn't be reviewing it! 

Instead Dr. Murray (Shona) writes practically about how women get into the situations of being overwhelmed, full of anxiety, and depressed despite being Christians. Dr. Murray takes the reader through 10 stations in the "refresh gym" to help get women back on track and living the healthiest and most honoring life possible.  Dr Murray talks about things that other books for Christian women completely neglect. She addresses things like sleep, media influences, nutrition, and physical exercise and how they impact a Christian walk. The one that really sticks out in my mind is from the chapter Re-Create in which Murray says, 

Your body was bought with the price of Christ's blood. He bought it with the greatest ransom ever paid. Try to think of the most expensive thing you ever bought Was it a car or a house? How much did you protect and maintain it? Now think of how much Christ paid for your body and consider how you are managing this blood bought property. "You are not your own," says Paul. "You were bought at a price". We have a new owner who has paid a huge price for his property. He claims our bodies as his own and calls us to manage them for his glory.

Man! Isn't that convicting? Imagine if every Christian was operating at 100%. If we weren't slowed down by dependency on social media, sugar, or self caused exhaustion. In Refresh, Dr. Murray lays out simple and practical steps to achieve this goal. 

I think it is just fabulous.

If I could give a book more than an A+ I would. I might just have to create something higher for those few special books that really touch my heart. Anyways, Refresh would be one of those books. I don't care if you are 13 and trying to navigate middle school or 95 and trying to live the winter of your life honoring God, this book is for you.  Basically what I am saying is go out and read this book right now. Put it on the top of your stack of books and make sure you share it with the next woman you meet that seems like she could use a little refreshing. 

You Can Keep Your Tale, I'll Take the Truth

It is Sunday, and I normally don't post on Sunday. I try to take this day as a time to be with my family. However, I have really had a burden on my heart for a couple of days about something so I am going to share it now. I may write more on it later, but for now, here it is. 

I am sick of seeing articles that talk about the truth and reality of the Handmaiden's Tale, especially on the Facebook pages of Christian women. I haven't watched the show. I refuse to because I read the book in college while pursuing a minor in women's studies and I know now that it is an attack on the Christian faith. The author of Handmaid's Tale calls it purportedly Christian rather than genuinely Christian however, that didn't stop creators of the show using the song, "Onward Christian Soldiers" as the soundtrack to a graphic and disgusting rape scene. I have to ask, Christians, why are you watching this?!? But lets discuss that another day. For now, lets move on. 

I read an article recently where the author states that The Handmaiden's Tale is the writing on the wall (which is a biblical reference by the way!) for women in the United States of America of what is to come. You can read the full article here.  However, today I want to discuss one paragraph more than anything else. The author writes: 

Today, Atwood’s Tale reads less like speculative fiction and more like an appalling worst-case scenario. How far removed are we, really, from the reduction of women to the status of childbearing vessels, allowed no identity, property, family or passions of our own? After all, just in February an Oklahoma legislator asserted that a pregnant woman is just a “host” for the fetus, thereby losing the right to bodily autonomy.

Lets fact check that shall we? The legislator in question, Rep. Justin Humphrey (R), actually said, 

I understand that they feel like that is their body,” he said of women. “I feel like it is a separate — what I call them is, is you’re a ‘host.’ And you know when you enter into a relationship you’re going to be that host and so, you know, if you pre-know that then take all precautions and don’t get pregnant,” he explained. “So that’s where I’m at. I’m like, hey, your body is your body and be responsible with it. But after you’re irresponsible then don’t claim, well, I can just go and do this with another body, when you’re the host and you invited that in.

To summarize Representative Humphrey is saying, you had sex, the natural biological repercussion of sex is pregnancy. If you engaged in sexual activity, you need to be prepared to deal with the fact that you may very well conceive a human life. If that happens, you DO NOT have the right to end that life. 

THAT IS IT.

And by the way, calling it a fetus instead of a baby doesn't change the fact that you are ending a life. Don't believe me? Check out the definition of a fetus here. You aren't losing your bodily autonomy, you just aren't being allowed to end someone else's bodily autonomy. But that is a talk for another day. 

Now, I want to address the first part of her paragraph. She asks how far removed are we from a society in which women are reduced "to the status of childbearing vessels, allowed no identity, property, family or passions of our own?" 

Let me introduce you to the American military. 

These brave men and women are currently standing between us an ISIS. They get up and go to work every single day at home and abroad knowing that they may have to give their life in service to, and protection of, our country. The United States military stands between us and being forced to cover your entire body and face, from being beaten and raped as an act of war, and being beheaded in the street. 

How far removed are we from having our rights taken away? 

The length of all the servicemen standing between us and ISIS.       

And by the way, of those servicemen, 68% identify as Christian. 

So before you say that Christians are trying to take away the rights and liberties of women, remember who is charging in to the fight to keep the horrors of ISIS from coming here. 

Remember the young men and women facing down the horrors of ISIS so that we don't face them here. 

You can keep your tale, I'll take the truth. 

Motherhood Monday: Can I Be This Grateful?

Welcome to another Motherhood Monday! Motherhood is an incredible blessing. But it is also a huge challenge. Anyone that has experienced motherhood will tell you, there is an incredible shift in your very being when you become a mother. This is the day dedicated to all things "mommy" related. Check here each Monday for a new post.

I absolutely adore this picture, and let me tell you why. This is my very serious oldest child, William. He is my clean-it-up, don't-make-a-mess, time-to-do-work, child. 

In this picture he had just finished being outside for four hours while I coached twelve ladies in our garage gym ministry. 

He was hot, he was sweaty, and he was hungry. 

When we came inside he asked for a snack and I wanted to give him something to help him cool off, so I gave him some frozen grapes. He immediately took one out of the bag and popped it in his mouth. I told him to stop and that we needed to thank God for these grapes. William looked up to heaven and said, "God thank you, grapes"

One of the ladies in the gym was standing there and took this picture. It will forever make me think of how much gratitude my son has, for little bitty grapes. 

It makes me think, can I be this grateful? Do I look up to heaven with my heart open thanking my heavenly father for all that He has given me? During mealtime prayers, am I authentic in praising and thanking for the food before me or has it become just a habit that I do? Do I have William's level of gratitude when God lovingly calls me out and reminds me to be faithful? 

1 Thessalonians 5:18 says, "give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus." My new goal for myself is to be grateful like William, in all circumstances. I want to teach my boys what authentic gratitude is and why God is SO deserving of it. So I am going to start today! 

Today I am grateful for my sweet William that reminds me daily of how very loved we are by God and how much we have to be grateful for each and every day. Today I am grateful for the reminder of how much God has provided for us and how He molds and teaches us in unusual ways, even using our children to teach us new things. 

More Than A Mommy....

         I am an educated, ambitious, passionate young woman…. and I want to homeschool my children.

         I recently had a very difficult conversation with a person who greatly impacted my life. This person has acted as an adviser, a friend, and a pseudo-parent when mine weren’t there.  But, this week I had a strong disagreement with him over my chosen future.

         My friends and  family who have known me the longest seem to have the greatest issue with my choice. They can’t seem to wrap their minds around this idea. Kids are still a ways off, but I thought that having these discussions might help them to understand the choices that I am making now, and why I am making them. (Like not pursing a PhD just to prove that I can.) The exact comment that was made to me was that this person “thought that I wanted more for my life than that.”

         Ouch.

         I love to be in school. There is something wonderful about researching, developing, and proving your argument.  I love to learn. Wandering around a used bookstore is one of my favorite ways to spend an afternoon.

         However, I grew up in a very broken family. My mom and dad divorced when I was very young.  We kept up the pretense of him being involved in our lives but he moved away and started a new family. Soon every other weekend turned into every other month and by the time I got to college it was once a year of every other year. My mom is in the middle of her seventh marriage. So, I didn’t have the greatest example of what a secular family is supposed to look like, much less a Christ-centered family.

         I am sort of a jack-of-all-trades-and-master-of-none kind of person. I can do a little bit of everything at an acceptable level. There was no lightning bolt or burning bush that said, “ok Morgan, it is time for you to go to law/vet/medical school!” Instead I just kind of wandered along. I got my degree as fast as I could. I went to grad school because I was told I wasn’t smart enough for it. I did well at both things, but when I went to sleep at night I didn’t feel fulfilled. I was just meandering through life.

         So how did I go from wandering through life chasing worldly success to homemaker?

         After I accepted Christ as my savior I started thinking about my life purpose. Why am I here? What did God design me to do? One of my team members had me draw a figure like this one and fill in the blanks.

  

         The circles say experiences, abilities, and passion.  Experiences are the things that you have done in your life. These are the positions, opportunities, and relationships you have had. Abilities are your God given gifts; they are things that you have been trained to do and things that may just come to you naturally. Passion is what makes your heart sing? If you had a free day how would you spend it?

         So on the back of an IKEA napkin we drew this out and we started listing out the things that fit into each category. At the time, I wasn’t sure of where I was going or what I was doing so I listed everything. It was helpful for me to see it that way. So here are my answers as written:

         Experiences: after school aid , babysitter, bartender, broken home, bus boy(girl?), cater-water, daughter, dish washer, mission trip to El Salvador, nanny, personal assistant, restaurant manager, secretary, sister,  survivor, teacher, waitress.

         Abilities: a servant by nature, build lesson plans, care for multiple children at a time, detail-oriented, disciplined, gift for liberal arts (history/languages/music/art), hard worker, manage a restaurant, mix drinks, organize, structure, time management,

         Passion: If I have a free day I would want to spend it with my kids (this was when I was a nanny) or doing something productive. But if I can be totally honest, I am happiest when I am helping other people.

         Ok, so now I have a napkin covered in writing and I am no closer to knowing what I am supposed to do with my life. I put the napkin in my Bible and went about my daily business. Three weeks later my small group’s discussion was over the high calling of being a helpmeet to your husband and a mother to your children. The discussion lingered with me for days. That Sunday the sermon was on the Proverbs 31 woman and being diligent in working for your family. I got the message, loud and clear. But I couldn’t admit even to myself that God wanted me to be a homemaker.

         It wasn’t until I was talking with one of my team members that I was able to say out loud what my heart was screaming. I was sitting in her kitchen drinking tea and talking about what I was learning and studying when she looked up at me and said, “You know that there is nothing weak about admitting that you want a family, right?”

         My heart broke.

         I believe that God made me to be versatile. I will flourish in difficult situations or in the easiest of situations. There are some people who want to be doctors, when they think about it they get that rushing feeling in their chest, knowing that they are right where they belong. That is what I feel when I think about being a helpmeet for my husband and a mother to my children. I know that is what God has called me to do with my life. Sure, I could do other things and I will. But the primary purpose of my life is to raise up the next generation of godly Christians alongside my husband. So for now, I teach other people’s children. I try to model Christ-like behavior for them, and to be a light. But when the time comes, I will be ready to serve the kingdom of Christ by stepping out of the traditional “workforce” and working in my home instead.

          If you are struggling with feelings or doubt or if you are making a difference as a homemaker Check out the quote below.

        

        

Modesty Part 4

In church, in small groups, and in the blog world modesty is heavily debated. 
We hear a lot of these questions: 
"Is this skirt too short?" 
"Is this shirt too low cut?" 
"Are these jeans too tight?"

I have written about WHY MODESTY IS IMPORTANT, WHAT IT MEANS TO BE MODEST and about HOW TO MAKE ADJUSTMENTS TO YOUR WARDROBE to be more modest. Now I want to talk about modesty, but not with regard to our clothing. 

Modesty also has to do with how you move. When you walk, do you swing your hips? I don't mean the natural movement of a woman's hip. I mean the carefully rehearsed prance so many women do. I know a LOT of girls who practiced that motion in high school, I was one of them. It was something that I had seen other women do, and I thought that would help make me "beautiful". So my friends and I mimicked the women from the runways, strutting down the halls of my high school. As I got older it just became a habit, that I didn't think much of. Thankfully, I have a good friend and mentor who asked me, "Is that how you would walk before the King of Kings?"

Jewelry is another part of modesty that doesn't have much to do with clothes. Now, please hear me I am NOT anti-jewelry. I studied art in grad school, we love jewelry. Why you choose your necklace, why do you chose that necklace? Are you aware of the line made by the necklace that draws the eye to your breasts? I am not saying that jewelry must be avoided, I am saying that we must be aware of the choices we make. When I wear a necklace long enough that it sits on my breasts, what am I asking people to look at? 

Modesty also has to do with what you say. Do you engage in inappropriate or suggestive conversation? I know to a lot of Christian women the automatic response is, "of course not!" But I would like to talk specifically with young Christian women here. Christian women who are in college and high school. Inappropriate conversations run rampant in halls where teenagers roam. Guard your heart against these conversations. Watch what you say in response to inappropriate and suggestive conversations, this can be a slippery slope.  

Modesty is about so much more than just what you put on your body. 

Modesty is an attitude, it is a way of life.