Title Tuesday: The Language of Sex

Welcome to  Title Tuesday, my favorite day of the week. This day is dedicated to book suggestions, news, cartoons, and reviews. Let's jump in!

Oh my goodness… I don't even know where to start with this review. From rather tacky anatomical statements (that are supposed to be funny… maybe?) to sweeping generalizations about what women want, this book was rough to get through.

The Language of Sex: Experiencing the Beauty of Sexual Intimacy is written mostly by Ted Cunningham with additions and extras by Dr. Gary Smalley. Admittedly Smalley gets top billing, but I didn't feel like he contributed nearly as much as Ted Cunningham. 

Either way, this book has a lot of very familiar teachings on sex, many of which are not positive. I was impressed by Cunningham's insistence on reiterating that women can and do enjoy sex when their husbands slow down and get to know their wife's body.

However, that positive note alone was not enough to redeem the small portion in chapter 10 that had me fuming while listening on the treadmill. I was listening to this book on Christian Audio and I just about fell off the treadmill upon hearing the next section. 

This is the end of the chapter. Ted Cunningham is addressing common questions and he starts talking about porn use in a marriage.

While he admits that porn use is wrong as well as adulterous, it is his counsel to wives that is particularly egregious.

Ted uses 1 Peter chapter 3 as a means of a wife dealing with a husbands porn use. 

This isn’t okay or legitimate.

Here is why.

If Ted is talking to believing Christians (which is who this book is geared towards) then 1 Peter 3 doesn’t apply. 1 Peter 3 is specifically dealing with those that “do not believe the word”. That means nonbelievers. This scripture that he is referencing is about winning a lost husband to Christ not addressing Christian men who are stepping out of their marriage with porn!

As if misusing scripture to muzzle women isn't bad enough Cunningham also tells wives:

“don’t be on him about his addiction”
“to watch your own behavior”
“be honest about your own struggles with him”

None of this is okay. 

A wife cannot be vulnerable and open where there is deceit and deception, period. It is also not her behavior that caused or allows his porn use, it is his behavior and his responsibility, full stop.

Finally, secret porn use creates betrayal trauma in the deceived partner. Cunningham seems to skip over this portion as if it is hardly worth mentioning. 

This too, is not okay.

If you are a victim of secret porn use by your partner there are resources out there that can really help you rather than masking or ignoring the issues. Check out work by Betrayal Trauma Recovery (BTR), Sarah McDugal, The Patchwork Wife and Sheila Gregoire

For me personally, the teachings on dealing with pornography use are an insurmountable obstacle in being able to give this book anything more than 0 stars. The good teachings in this book can be found other places, do not pollute your heart or your mind with the outdated and misogynistic teachings about pornography use in marriage from a bygone era.  

Title Tuesday: The Great Sex Rescue... sort of

I am currently reading The Great Sex Rescue by @sheilagregoire.

I was on the launch team and read the PDF. I have read the paperback twice now and I am round the corner on number three and this book only came out this month.

I wanted to read, reread, mark, and lookup portions of this book because it is so controversial.

Sheila and her team tackle the issue of problematic teaching in the modern-day church and how they negatively impact marriages, demean women, and infantilize men within the church.

While I am not ready to write a full review yet, I can say if you are a Christian and you have ever bought (or been given) a marriage book, you need Sheila’s book to hold it up against. Want to take a look? You can find it here. 

Title Tuesday: Fair Play

Welcome to  Title Tuesday, my favorite day of the week! This day is dedicated to book suggestions, news, cartoons, and reviews. For 2020 I decided to structure my book reviews by breaking each month into topics. You can find my topics list here. This month we are covering marriage. So lets jump in!

Let me start off by saying that today's book is one that many not be popular in many Christian circles. Fair Play: A Game-Changing Solution for When You Have Too Much to Do (and More Life to Live) by Eve Rodsky is not a "Christian" book. In fact a lot of people would probably deem it a feminist text and move on. But, before I jump into that, lets talk about what this book is. 

Fair Play is an acknowledgement that in most marriages the majority of work inside the home falls primarily on the shoulders of women. In fact, modern women are being CRUSHED by the weight of everything that they are rightly and unjustly expected to do for their families. 

Fair play is a system that helps couples to balance out the work load. The best part about this book is that Rodsky says clearly how to do that. In a lot of marriage books this idea is summed up as, "have a conversation with your spouse about responsibilities" and then they move on. This book IS the conversation you need to have with your spouse, it is also the conversation on how to make the changes needed. 

I will say that when my husband and I used this system we had to add in categories because we are a military family and we homeschool. Both of those qualifiers have specific needs and requirements that this book just didn't cover. 

Now, as to the idea that this book is unbiblical... if you have read the Bible, sharing one another's burdens and having dominion over your sphere of influence is not a male/female thing. It is a Christian thing. There isn't anything in the Bible that says a man can't help with household chores. The word of God places a great deal of significance on treating one another with respect and a great many Christian marriages could use this book to help get out of some ugly, un-Christlike patterns.

Overall, I give Fair Play: A Game-Changing Solution for When You Have Too Much to Do (and More Life to Live) five stars. I have come back to this book often and I have already loaned it to a friend. While it isn't a Christian book, there isn't anything in the text that compromises my theological standard. 

Title Tuesday: Winning Him Without Words

 Welcome to  Title Tuesday, my favorite day of the week! This day is dedicated to book suggestions, news, cartoons, and reviews. For 2020 I decided to structure my book reviews by breaking each month into topics. You can find my topics list here. This month we are covering marriage. So lets jump in!

Today we are going to cover a book for women that are in spiritually mismatched marriages by  Lynn Donovan and Dineen Miller. 

Winning Him Without Words: 10 Keys to Thriving in Your Spiritually Mismatched Marriage is a really good book in a lot of ways. Mismatched marriages are a huge challenge to the body of Christ. It seems (to me) like churches are mostly filled with women bringing their children to church these days, while men chose to stay at home. 

Winning Him Without Words is encouraging and uplifting. The main message is that you need to cling to God in all things, even an unbelieving spouse. The authors give solid advice because they have been in the position of loving a spouse who does follow Christ. I would like to note that this book is also relevant to women whose husbands profess to be believers but who are not living a Christian life.  

Overall, I give Winning Him Without Words: 10 Keys to Thriving in Your Spiritually Mismatched Marriage 4 stars. It is a good book to read through and glean as much as you can. It would make a great book club for a women's group at church. The main reason that it wouldn't get five stars is because having read it once, I wouldn't read it a second time.

 

Title Tuesday: Wife in Pursuit

Welcome to  Title Tuesday, my favorite day of the week! This day is dedicated to book suggestions, news, cartoons, and reviews. For 2020 I decided to structure my book reviews by breaking each month into topics. You can find my topics list here. This month we are covering marriage. So lets jump in!

Today we are talking about Selena Frederick's book Wife in Pursuit: 31 Daily Challenges for Loving Your Husband Well. 

This review is going to be pretty easy... this is a great book. 

I did all 31 challenges and it was actually a lot of fun! I found myself thinking about my husband more often throughout the day. I enjoyed working on each challenge and putting it together even with three small children at home.

The most surprising thing that I can say about this book is that it was the most helpful for me when my husband and I were in a disagreement! These challenges helped me to refocus and think kindly towards him even if we were not really getting along at the moment. 

Overall, I give Wife in Pursuit: 31 Daily Challenges for Loving Your Husband Well a robust 5 stars. No matter where you are at in your marriage having a tool to help you love and pursue your spouse is never a bad idea!

Title Tuesday: The ADHD Effect

 Welcome to  Title Tuesday, my favorite day of the week! This day is dedicated to book suggestions, news, cartoons, and reviews.

We are officially in to month TWO of 2020. How is that possible already? For this month the book reviews here on The Forgive Former Feminist will focus on Marriage. If you want to see the full list of books I have reviewed on marriage check out my goodreads page!

Today we are taking a look at The ADHD Effect: Understand and Rebuild Your Relationship in Six Steps by Melissa Orlov. While the title of this book doesn't immediately make one think of marriage, if you are married to a person dealing with untreated ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) this book can be quite a resource. 

When Brian and I got married neither of us knew he had ADHD, so we didn't have to tools necessary to adequately deal with the blessings and challenges that come with ADHD. We spent a lot of time and energy battling over things that we didn't realize were neurological, not behavior based. When I found this book it was like a breath of fresh air. 

This is the first ADHD marriage book I read that didn't make the spouse responsible for the person with ADHD. The ADHD Effect also does a good job of treating the ADHD person with respect rather than making it seem like they are somehow broken or less-than because they are not nuerotypical. Orlov gives many recommendations for helping to let go of unreasonable expectations and helping your ADHD spouse to feel valued.  

A bonus about this book is the fact that a lot of what Orlov said also helped me relate better to my child with ADHD as well!

Overall, I give The ADHD Effect: Understand and Rebuild Your Relationship in Six Steps by Melissa Orlov a solid 4 stars. If you are dealing with difficulties in your marriage because of untreated ADHD this is a great resource. 

Title Tuesday: Shattered Vows

Welcome to  Title Tuesday, my favorite day of the week! This day is dedicated to book suggestions, news, cartoons, and reviews. I write this portion of my blog because I am a big believer in the motivational speaker Charlie Jones' quote which says, "You will be the same person in five years as you are today except for the people you meet and the books you read.” I try to meet as many new people as possible and to read everything I can. This is my way of sharing that information with you. You can see a visual summary of the books I have reviewed for both adults and children over on my Facebook page. If you are interested in understanding my rating system for books you can read my Book Review Explanation here and What I Believe here. If you want to check out what I am currently reading or what I want to read next, friend me on Goodreads!

Good morning! Every once in a while I share book reviews geared towards women trying to recovery from a husband's (physical/emotional/cyber) infidelity. These books will not interest most people, so if you are one of my regular #Title Tuesday readers and you aren't interested in this topic, I promise I will be back to my regular reviews/cartoons next week.

Alright, those of you that are still reading, I want to share with you about Debra Laaser's book, Shattered Vows. For anyone that has had their marriage ravaged by infidelity, you know that it is a devastating blow. It can take months to years to heal from a single affair, longer if their are repeat offenses or continued lying.

In the case of Debra Laaser, her marriage was rocked by the discovery of her husband's multiple sexual betrayals. Her husband lost his job and they entered a very difficult season of recovery and trust rebuilding. Now, they travel together all over the globe and tell other couples their story. They are an incredible example of the redemptive nature of Jesus Christ in a marriage.

I won't lie to you, some of this book is difficult to read. The concept of dealing with your own issues and pain can be frustrating when your heart has been broken by your spouse. However, there was one particular paragraph from Laaser's book that made me keep reading and pushing forward, On page 67 Debra writes,

The feelings won't just go away over time. Not thinking about your husband's sinful decisions won't make them magically disappear. Quickly forgiving your husband and "moving on" will only bury your feelings of anger and sadness- only to have them seep out at unexpected times down the road. The better choice is to go to any lengths to get the support you deserve so you can heal and thrive, not just survive.

This, to me, summarizes the entire book. Recovery from (physical/emotional/cyber) infidelity is incredibly hard and Debra Laaser walks the reader through the first steps with incredible grace.

In Shattered Vows, Debra tackles tough topics like:
-does marital sex prevent pornography use?
--sexually transmitted diseases
-the drip disclosure method
-healthy grieving
-slips and relapses
-and a whole lot more

Debra is honest, concise, and doesn't pander to the "the wife needs to stay in her lane" junk that is often passed around in moral/sexual purity discussion. She does delve a bit into the idea of "codependency", which I don't believe is a prevalent as many psychologists and counselors seem to think. However, that withstanding, this book is excellent and I strongly recommend it to anyone deal with marital (physical/emotional/cyber) infidelity. Overall I give Debra Laaser's book Shattered Vows a solid A+, and it is the first book I recommend to women dealing with marital infidelity.

Title Tuesday: Becoming Gertrude

Welcome to  Title Tuesday, my favorite day of the week! This day is dedicated to book suggestions, news, cartoons, and reviews. I write this portion of my blog because I am a big believer in the motivational speaker Charlie Jones' quote which says, "You will be the same person in five years as you are today except for the people you meet and the books you read.” I try to meet as many new people as possible and to read everything I can. This is my way of sharing that information with you. You can see a visual summary of the books I have reviewed for both adults and children over on my Facebook page. If you are interested in understanding my rating system for books you can read my Book Review Explanation here and What I Believe here. If you want to check out what I am currently reading or what I want to read next, friend me on Goodreads!

Today I am sharing my thoughts on Becoming Gertrude by Janice Peterson. Let me start by saying that I wanted to like this book from the beginning. It is from NavPress and that automatically makes it interesting to me.

There were a lot of things in this book that I really liked. My absolute favorite thing was her mentioning of the fact that "spiritual mentor-ship" gives the impression that there is some kind of hierarchy in the Christian faith when in fact we are all equal at the foot of the cross. She recommends instead "spiritual friendships" where you share one another's burdens and joys in Christ. That is awesome and I have never seen that in a Christian book before!

However...

As the author tells several stories about her interactions with various friends I came to realize that she has absolutely no problem with women being friends with men that are not their husbands. These are not casual friendships either. These are the kind with inside jokes and meeting together for extended periods of time, confiding and sharing intimate life details. While this author may have had the maturity to keep her heart in check I am willing to bet 75% of her target audience won't have the same discipline. Due to that fact alone, I cannot in good conscience give this book anything higher than a C- and I cannot recommend it to fellow believers.

Title Tuesday: Loving Luther

Welcome to  Title Tuesday, my favorite day of the week! This day is dedicated to book suggestions, news, cartoons, and reviews. I write this portion of my blog because I am a big believer in the motivational speaker Charlie Jones' quote which says, "You will be the same person in five years as you are today except for the people you meet and the books you read.” I try to meet as many new people as possible and to read everything I can. This is my way of sharing that information with you. You can see a visual summary of the books I have reviewed for both adults and children over on my Facebook page. If you are interested in understanding my rating system for books you can read my Book Review Explanation here and What I Believe here. If you want to check out what I am currently reading or what I want to read next, friend me on Goodreads!

As I mentioned a few weeks ago, I am finally done with my 6 month break from reading fiction. I have only read two fictional books this month and one of the was Loving Luther by Allison Pittman. I am legally required to tell you that this was sent to me by the Tyndale Blogging Program in exchange for a free and unbiased review. :)

So let me start by saying that I LOVED this book! 

Keep in mind that it is a novel, so it is a fictional account of what Katharina Von Bora's life was like prior to her marring Martin Luther. Yes, THE Martin Luther. The story starts with her life as a very young child getting abandoned at a convent by her father. We see her intelligence and convictions forming from an early age and only grow stronger as she matures into adulthood. Without spoiling any of the story we watch as she escapes the confines of the convent and pursues a relationship with a man.. that isn't LUTHER?!?! Only to have her heart broken and eventually end up with Luther. 

What I Liked:
The imagery in this book is phenomenal, you can almost feel the cold of the stone convent as you read Pittman's writing. 

The characters (even the supporting ones) are very well developed. We get a clear sense of not only their biographical information but also their moral and philosophical ideologies and how the impacted Katharina. 

The development of Katharina's other love interest Jerome was so incredibly good. I absolutely loved him in the beginning (as we are supposed to) and I could not sand him at the end. His character arch was expertly written. 

What I Didn't Like:
I was a little disappointed that the books ends at their marriage. With a title like "Loving Luther" I think I was expecting to read about how she loved and supported him while they were married. But, I think that may just be a classic example of judging a book by its cover.

Overall, I give Loving Luther by Allison Pittman a solid A+. This book would be an excellent addiition to any Christian library (church, private school, homeschool)

If Allison Pittman decides to continue this book out into a series and write about the Luther's married life, I will be THE FIRST person in line to buy that book. Or is she wants to tackle any other historical person of the Christian faith, I will be in line for those books too!

Title Tuesday: Your Marriage Today... and Tomorrow

Welcome to  Title Tuesday, my favorite day of the week! This day is dedicated to book suggestions, news, cartoons, and reviews. I write this portion of my blog because I am a big believer in the motivational speaker Charlie Jones' quote which says, "You will be the same person in five years as you are today except for the people you meet and the books you read.” I try to meet as many new people as possible and to read everything I can. This is my way of sharing that information with you. You can see a visual summary of the books I have reviewed for both adults and children over on my Facebook page. If you are interested in understanding my rating system for books you can read my Book Review Explanation here and What I Believe here. If you want to check out what I am currently reading or what I want to read next, friend me on Goodreads!

I recently listened to the wedding plans of a dear friend. In listening to her talk, I realized that she was SO EXCITED for her wedding, not for her marriage. Today, our society is all about the wedding. In fact, in 2013 the wedding industry boasted being worth roughly 53.4 billion dollars. And yet for most couples, when the ceremony is over there is almost NO preparation for the real life that waits after you say, "I do". That is why when I was offered a chance to review Crawford and Karen Loritts' new book Your Marriage Today... and Tomorrow, I was thrilled! 

To start this review I have to say that usually I don't like books that are co-authored by couples but this one is totally different. This couple is one that I would LOVE to meet in real life. I feel like this is the kind of marriage mentor-ship that you would get sitting across the kitchen table. You know the kind I mean, where you just sit and listen while they drop 40 years worth of wisdom on you. 

So with that being said, lets jump in.

What I loved:
The purposeful look to the future and the legacy you leave, not just living in the moment. 
The use of stories from their own life to help the reader relate.
The book is biblical, there aren't "I thinks" it is all tied to scripture
Focused questions to think about (could be used to spark discussion with a spouse or group)
This quote: "Forgiveness declares that we are not enemies, we are allies" (page 128)

What I didn't like:
Absolutely Nothing!

Overall, I give Your Marriage Today... and Tomorrow by Crawford and Karen Loritts a solid A+. If you are about to get married put this book on your wedding registry. If you are newly married go buy it. If you have been married for any length of time this is a great way to remind yourself of the purpose of marriage and the reality that the wedding is the start of the legacy.

Wife to Wife Wednesday: Getting Out of the Rut

Good morning! 

Welcome to Wife to Wife Wednesday, the day that we discuss any and all issues relating to marriage. As I said in my series introduction a few weeks ago, sex is a super important part of marriage. It is an incredible gift that can be amazing... but it can also be devastating when it doesn't go well. We have talked about when Body Image impacts your sex-life and where Christians can purchase lingerie without feeling skeevy. (Yes, I said skeevy, deal with it.)

Today I want to talk about something that may make a few readers uncomfortable and it is, an intimacy app for married couples. It is designed to help get married couple out of a rut in the bedroom. This app is called Ultimate Intimacy and it is AMAZING. But, this isn't your usual sex app. As it says on the website,

Ultimate Intimacy is the product of two Christian couples on a mission to strengthen marriages by making lovemaking fun and deepening couples’ connection and intimacy.

There isn’t anything that is gross or unseemly.

You can edit your preferences in the settings. This includes things like foreplay, oral actions, and duration of each action.

The Ultimate Intimacy app allows for the users to enter their names so the instructions say “Morgan does this…” rather than being generic. You can also set a password for the app if you have older children that often use your phone. :)

There are a TON of different sexual positions and recommendation to try and the best part is that these are done with figures, not real life people. There won’t be any concern over seeing something inappropriate or that could trigger moral purity issues for a spouse.

There are a list of topics to discuss so that the intimacy isn’t just sexual, but really getting to know your spouse. There are links to articles, resources, and gifts to help build up your marriage.

Overall, I HIGHLY recommend the Ultimate Intimacy app. It is a fun way to keep the spark burning in your marriage in a God honoring way. You can download the app here for Android and here for Apple.

I should also mention that I am not an affiliate of this website.
I don't get anything from recommending it.

We tried it and enjoyed it.
I thought there might be other spouses out there that would enjoy this neat resource.

Title Tuesday: Rethinking Sexuality

Welcome to  Title Tuesday, my favorite day of the week! This day is dedicated to book suggestions, news, cartoons, and reviews. I write this portion of my blog because I am a big believer in the motivational speaker Charlie Jones' quote which says, "You will be the same person in five years as you are today except for the people you meet and the books you read.” I try to meet as many new people as possible and to read everything I can. This is my way of sharing that information with you. You can see a visual summary of the books I have reviewed for both adults and children over on my Facebook page. If you are interested in understanding my rating system for books you can read my Book Review Explanation here and What I Believe here. If you want to check out what I am currently reading or what I want to read next, friend me on Goodreads!

Today, I want to talk about sex.

Wait! It is Title Tuesday. Why are we talking about sex?!?

The answer is, sex permeates our culture and with good reason. God gave us sex to be an awesome experience between a man and woman in the bounds of holy matrimony.  Sex and sensual imagery is all over our society, but not in the way that God designed it. It is assaulting our minds on billboards, oozing into our homes via television, and commandeering the screens on our computers. 

Because of the prevalence of rape, infidelity, homosexuality, transgenderism, pornography, and just plain lust, sex is a topic that the Christian church should be addressing regularly, and yet in most churches it is almost never addressed. 

That is why I want to tell you about Dr. Juli Slattery's newest book, Rethinking Sexuality. Dr. Slattery takes a hard stance on sexual brokenness and the effect that it has on a believer's life. This book is specifically geared towards Bible-believing Christians. On page 8 of Rethinking Sexuality Slattery states, 

The focus has been on compelling teenagers to stay virgins and exposing the many ways that sexuality translates into sin. Because we tend to address sexuality with this problem-solving approach, we divide people into categories of virgins and sinners, sexually whole and sexually broken. If you found yourself in the wrong category, church was the last place that you wanted to seek help. 

This resonates SO MUCH with me and this is just from the first chapter! 

Slattery spends the rest of the book explaining that sexual discipleship should be prevalent in every church congregation. Se also does a fabulous job of explaining exactly how our sexuality interfaces with our theology and our beliefs about God. This book is not written for one gender or another. Instead this book is designed to help bring light into the shadowy places that we as Christians think that God should not be. (As if He doesn't already know about it????) Slattery forces the readers to change their way of thinking about sexuality to help Christian better model sacred sexuality rather than a shame filled secret to be hidden away.

Overall, I give Rethinking Sexuality a solid A+. I think this book is something that literally every Christian should read. It doesn't matter if you are single, newly married, or celebrating your golden anniversary. This book has tools and resources to help you to model your sexuality after the inventor of sexuality and to stand firm in the face of society's pressure to conform to worldly sexuality. 

This book becomes available next week, July 24th. but you can pre-order it on Amazon here, and I totally recommend doing that! 

Wife to Wife Wednesday: Body Image in the Marriage Bed

Good morning! 

Welcome to Wife to Wife Wednesday, the day that we discuss any and all issues relating to marriage. 

Today is the first edition of our series on Keeping the Spark Burning in Your Marriage and I am SO excited to jump in!

As I said in my series introduction last week, sex is a super important part of marriage. It is an incredible gift that can be amazing... but it can also be devastating when it doesn't go well. One of the number one complaints that I have heard from women in our fitness ministry is that they don't want to have sex because they are uncomfortable with their bodies. 

So what do you do when your view of your body negatively impacts your desire to have sex?  

Let me start by saying that I have totally been there. I have had three (9+ pound) babies in less than 3.5 years. 

I know exactly what it is like to not want to have sex because you don't like your body. 

My first word of advice to not deny your spouse affection just because you don't like what you see in the mirror. We (as women) tend to be VERY self critical and we don't want our husbands to see the "ugly" parts. More than likely your spouse doesn't even notice the things that you don't like about your body. He just wants to be with you. Don't let your body hold you back from him,  if you think HE doesn't like it. I promise, he likes your body just fine.

Now, I know I just said that your spouse probably doesn't even notice the things that you don't like about your body , but you do. In that case, I think it is totally ok to pursue health and fitness.  Little changes one step at a time can help you to love your body more. Next week I will be talking about how to pick out lingerie without feeling gross or sketchy about it, and that can be a HUGE confidence boost for your body image. 

Here is how I pursue positive body image in the marriage bed:

1.) Meal Plan

Meal planning is the number one way I recommend to my athletes to help them get rid of unwanted body fat. The reason for that is because having a plan for healthy and nutritious food prevents you from wanting to run through the drive-thru really quickly on your way home. 80% of your body composition is built on your diet... not the gym. I have this meal planner and I really like it. It is simple and easy to follow. You can find a TON of meal planning binders, planners and organizers on Pinterest. Try one or two out and find a system that works for you and your family. Make sure that you are eating plenty of vegetables and 9 times out of 10 that will make a huge difference in body fat composition.

2.) Meal Prep
I am a huge fan of meal prepping. Once you have planned out what your meals are going to be you need to assemble the ingredients in a way that makes sense for your family. I LOVE crockpot meals, especially since we have a little baby currently. I prep these Freezable Crockpot Meals about once every three months. They are great for the days that I just don't feel like cooking. I simply cut open the bag, dump them into the crockpot and walk away. This is the crockpot that I use.  

3.) Move your body. 

It doesn't matter if you are going for a light walk around the neighborhood or if you are trying to max-out your power clean. You need to be moving your body every single day. My recommendation for most women is to get up out of your chair and move at least once an hour. If you are the mom of little, when they play you play. If your two year old squats, you squat. If they are running races, run with them. Get up and be active. Get a yoga DVD to do in your home. Invite your husband to go on a walk with you after dinner. There are entire boards on Pinterest dedicated just to fitness. Check them out and get creative. 

4.) Make a list.
Make a list of all of your best attributes. Do you have fabulous eyes? Do you always see the best in people? Does your hair curl really well? Do you always remember people's birthdays and anniversaries? Do you have a gorgeous jawline? Do you manage your finances really well? Do you keep a clean home? Are your kids super well behaved? Ask your friends for help if you need it, bur physically write out a list of the awesome things about you. I bet your husband cares a whole lot more about those things than he does about the fact that you haven't lost that last 15 pounds yet. 

Finally, let me say, you are a beautiful gift from God. Your body is unique and wonderful. In the world hat we live in today we have been fed a line that if you don't look like the images in the magazines, movies, or porn, then you aren't attractive. 

I am here to tell you that is a load of crap. Don't you dare believe it.
You are a beautiful woman of God pursuing intimacy with your husband. You have nothing to be ashamed of with your body, even if there are parts that you don't like. Do not let your body hold you back from enjoying a brilliant sex life with your husband.