One of the questions
that is asked most frequently of me about this blog is my relationship status.
My usual reply is that the focus of this blog is not me personally, but rather
the struggles, trials, and victories of being a young Christian woman moving away
from the feminist mindset. However, one of the ways I write is through personal
experience so today I am going to address the subject of relationship status.
I am single.
The response to this is
often, do you date? No, I do not date in the traditional sense. There are scars
from my past that have prevented me from being comfortable doing the
traditional “dating” thing. Which in the long run, is probably for the better
anyways but that is a post for another day.
Today I want to talk
about courtship.
Courtship is one of
those words that incite a really strong response in some people. I will be
posting an article in the near future about the differences between courtship and
dating. For now, let’s just focus on courtship. Courtship has different
definitions and there are different ways of going about a “traditional
courtship”. In most instances, a young
man would become interested in a young woman and approach her father. At this
point, the father would get to know the young man, mentor him, and learn about
his beliefs. If the father saw no obvious issues, or problems the young man
would be given permission to court the young woman, if she agreed. This
courtship would take place in the presence of family or chaperone. The parents
would watch the relationship develop and would step in if there was an issue or
if the young pair was headed in the wrong directions. After an appropriate amount of time the young
man would approach the young woman’s father and ask for her hand in marriage.
If the father granted his permission then the young man would propose to the
young woman. This is in the ideal situation.
My story wasn’t exactly
ideal.
This is part one of Courtship. To read part two click here.
I love the idea of courtship. In my teens, I read Joshua Harris' books, as well as Eric & Leslie Ludy's story and Elizabeth Elliot's book Passion & Purity. When I finally met my husband, we had more of a "dating" relationship than a "courtship" (I realized relationships are complicated!), but we tried to involve both our parents in our relationship. :)
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